


Grinds My Gears

by FoolsgoldFenrir



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Future, Dildos, Gen, It's cursed af, Lana dun goofed, Masturbation, Masturbation Interruptus, Porn Watching, Sex Toys, She gets caught, Stick around for the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:35:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24714673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FoolsgoldFenrir/pseuds/FoolsgoldFenrir
Summary: Today's been a shitty day, and Lana's just gotten back from detention. She's gotta blow off steam somehow, and the way she decides to do so is a bit steamier than one would expect.
Kudos: 1





	Grinds My Gears

**Author's Note:**

> Well, here's a story I never thought I'd actually write. A bit shorter than my usual one-shots, but I still had fun writing it. My first lewd without an actual pairing in mind, but still lewd and with something in the end that makes this a bit goofy. So... not sure if this is tamer than my usual lewds or not. You be the judge. This was written more for the sake of the joke I have planned at the end but it does tie into the (rather out of order of being posted) timeline of events that happen in the same universe as other works and thus gets referenced in them sometimes.
> 
> This work was originally posted on FFN on March 22nd, 2019.

One Fall afternoon, a lone teenager was walking home along the sidewalk. A backwards red baseball cap sat on her head, messy blonde hair sticking out from the rim and hole from the front. She'd been cutting it short for years now, and at this point it was just barely long enough to cover the back of her neck and a bit of her shoulders. She wore an open long-sleeved black and blue fleece jacket with a murky green shirt underneath. Despite the breeze, she still insisted on wearing denim jeans with holes torn around the knees. Yeah, torn - they weren't always like that, she simply made a few wardrobe modifications. And to top off the look, she had some black Converse sneakers.

15 year old Lana Loud trudged along with her hands in her jacket pockets, an annoyed expression on her face. Normally, she'd be walking home alongside Lola and Lucy after they later picked up Lisa and Lily from middle school and elementary school, respectively. Despite being old enough to, Lucy never quite liked driving Vanzilla since although that thing pulled through several decades of use it was starting to fall apart. It just wasn't very safe anymore, so they opted to just walk instead. They could use the fresh air anyway.

Instead, she was walking home alone after an hour of detention because some guy provoked her ire and wouldn't stop until she delivered a single punch to the gut. She didn't even punch that hard. Whatever, he should've known better than to compare her to Whitney Wisconsin, eeugh. At least it wasn't a suspension.

When she finally came home, she slammed the door shut and dropped her bag by the wall. The other three Loud sisters that still lived under the same roof were all on the couch watching some TV. Well, Lisa and Lucy were, anyway. Lola was just browsing on her phone but still sitting in between the two. Lily must've been up in her room or something. She was the first to notice her twin, though she didn't take her eyes off the miniature screen.

"Hey Lana." Lola said absentmindedly.

"Hey. Sorry I'm late." Lana grumbled.

"Detention, huh?"

"Yeah, lil' bastard bitched and moaned to a teacher even though he was clearly trying to get a reaction outta me."

"At least he'll maybe know not to mess with you anymore."

"Yeah, hopefully."

Lana made her way upstairs to her room. Now that there were much more room and less kids to take care of at the same time, they each got their own bedrooms. Lucy, Lola and Lisa just kept the same rooms that they used to share with a roommate (and Lily taking Luna and Luan's old one), though Lana was moved up to Lori and Leni's room since it already had a blue color scheme anyway. She did still have some renovating to do as she was _not_ going to keep all that girly stuff in now that the whole room was hers.

She flopped onto a large bed that was basically Lori and Leni's old beds combined into one queen-sized one. Usually on shitty days like this, she could simply nap for a bit and then she'd be her chipper self once again. Not this time. No matter how much she tried to close her eyes and fall asleep, she just couldn't.

Then it hit her. She needed some stress relief, alright, but not the calm kind. No, she needed to let it all out at once. In a burst of raw emotion, like anger, or something, or-

Her eyes drifted to her desk, on top of which sat a laptop and a pair of headphones underneath it. Not the wireless kind she saw all the time, she didn't trust those to sync up properly. And when you've not only gotta deal with regular annoying teen hormones, but are also grody-ass Lana Loud… you need that audio to be as synced up and private as possible. Her eyes also wandered to Lori's former closet. The door was ajar and in it was a medium-sized cardboard box.

She walked over to it and dug through its contents. Soon she found what she was looking for and shoved it down the front of her left pants leg, trying to hide any sign of anything being there. She also picked up the laptop in her arms with the wired headphones held tightly close to her chest and then headed downstairs. She didn't want anyone being able to hear anything going on at all.

Trying to be as discreet as possible, she tiptoed down the steps and behind the couch as quietly as she could manage. Soon she reached the door and was almost there! The second she turned the doorknob, a loud _*creak*_ sounded and six pairs of eyes faced in her direction. She quickly hid the laptop and headphones behind her back.

"Where are you going?" Lucy asked.

"And what's behind your back?" Lola questioned and pointed at her.

"I, too, would like to know what is going on." Lisa said.

"Oh, uhh… nothing! Nothing." Lana's eyes darted side to side as she held a sheepish smile.

"Doesn't look like nothing. What are you hiding?" Lola put her phone down and got out of her seat but didn't move away.

"Really sis, I'm not hiding anything! I just wanna… make some repairs on Vanzilla!"

Lola narrowed her eyes at her suspiciously. "Hmmm… okay!" Lola sat back down and went back to what she was previously doing.

Lana internally cheered and closed the door with her foot before switching back to holding the objects normally. She made her way over to the garage right near the house. Luckily, she also had the remote to control the door with her. The metal guard slowly rose and ricketed up, then down after she walked in and closed it.

She watched in satisfaction as it finally shut completely, providing a nice amount of shade within the room. Still light enough to see, and still peaceful at the same time. It was colder in the garage than outside, but she didn't mind too much. After all, she had more important matters to _take care_ of. She was already giddy just thinking about it, and she always liked the garage anyway.

In the center of the garage was the old, broken down minivan affectionately known by the Loud family as Vanzilla. She liked to come in there and sit inside while reminiscing about the past. When times were more simple, and fun, and wholesome… and not as lonely. Sure, she still had some of her siblings around with her everyday, but she missed the times it was a full house. Gee, she really took those times for granted, didn't she?

Not this time, though. This time, she had a different, more… risque idea in mind. And what a perfect opportunity to finally indulge in it. As well as she can with what she had, anyway.

She opened the side door and climbed into the backseat from the right, shutting it behind her. She placed the laptop on the seat to her left and turned around, facing it in the middle seat. She plugged the headphones in and placed them on the seat besides her while opening up the laptop.

It was an old laptop, since the family was still on a tight budget (but not as much as they used to be) they still dealt with hand-me-downs. This was Lori's old laptop, the one she got on her 17th birthday so long ago. Surprisingly, it still worked somewhat okay, but unsurprisingly, it was rather laggy and often glitched. Normally she was patient enough to deal with that while casually browsing. It seemed so much longer to just start up. The wait was agonizing, and did nothing to help her already bad mood.

After about a minute or two, it finally brought her to the home screen. She quickly opened up an incognito browser page and furiously typed away at the keyboard in the URL. What she was looking for didn't take as long to load and she was soon ready to go. She started undoing the button and zipper of her jeans and pulled them down to her ankles, making the object she previously stashed there fly out.

It was a dildo, except not shaped like a normal one. It was in the shape of an open end wrench, and also designed to look almost like a real one, color, details and all. Her second best choice because, well, there was no way in hell she was gonna be shoving a real wrench up anywhere. That would be just as stupid as going after a belt sander. She was the Queen of Risks, but even she could tell it wasn't worth it. Infections and all, y'know. (But enough about that, back to the action!)

It landed right on the front of her dark blue boxer shorts with a white trim, lightly resting right where she intended it to be soon. She slipped those off too, making it fall onto the seat. Picking it up and sitting back down bare-assed, she eyed the object lustfully.

She looked around for something but realized she couldn't find it. Aw shit, she forgot the lube. Ah well, she could just make do. And that she did, licking it and spreading it around, even spitting to make sure it was lubricated enough. Soon it was entirely glistening with drool.

After about a minute of that, she slipped her headphones on and hit the play button. As the music and sound filled her ears, she switched into a comfortable position. One end of the 'toy' was brought up to her kitty with the two points gently poking between the 'lips.' She got more used to the sensation the deeper they were pushed, until the whole head of the wrench toy was engulfed in her walls. She let out a low growl of pleasure as it did.

Now, just because the hard part of this was done didn't mean that she herself was done. Not even close. As whatever it was she was watching on the computer played, with the other end of the toy tightly gripped in her right hand she pushed it further in with some of the shaft. The detailed features on it made the feeling even better.

She panted as she started thrusting it back and forth inside. Being a plumber and mechanic meant she was no stranger to multitasking, so her free left hand snaked up her shirt and bra and kneaded her left breast. She let out several high-pitched sounds from the extra contact.

Things continued that way at an erratic pace - sometimes quick and rough and other times slow and smooth so that she could regain her energy and go back to the former. Her efforts soon paid off as she had a burning feeling that she would reach nirvana soon.

And she did. One final thrust and her eyes rolled back. Her vision got blurry and all that mattered to her in that moment was enjoying what she had worked so hard to achieve. The floodgates had opened, and she was quite vocal about it. Those guttural roars and moans would have definitely been heard by the others had she not moved to the garage for the act.

She paused the computer, and fortunately for her it had not finished entirely yet. Despite sitting there quivering in her own sweat and juices, even messier than before, she still was not finished.

Meanwhile, back at the house, Lucy, Lola and Lisa were still watching the television. It wasn't until now that they realized something was up.

"Wait a minute… but we haven't even _been_ in Vanzilla for a while now!" Lola gasped, sitting up from her previous slouching position.

"Yeah, so…? What about that?" Lucy asked.

Lisa simply sighed in a disinterested fashion. "Is this is about your elder twin's sudden departure, Lola?"

"Yeah, come to think of it, she was definitely hiding something behind her back!"

"Yes, she was. Nobody can hide a laptop and headphones that easily."

"She was hiding that stuff?"

Lisa gave her an 'are-you-kidding-me?' look. "Yes, Lola. Going by that information, I hypothesize that she is not currently making any repairs to the van."

"Why didn't you say anything?!"

"I thought you could tell and simply didn't care, as was the case for me."

Lucy got up. "Should we check on her, just to make sure she's alright?"

"Yeah, we should! Who knows if something bad happened?"

Lisa pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed again. She wanted to tell them that she knew exactly what was going on, yet at the same time, wanted to see for herself. Before she could change her mind, she nodded and followed two of her older sisters out the door and towards the garage.

The garage door was shut, but they were not about to be defeated. Lucy quickly went inside and came back out holding a spare remote. The door slowly moved up, revealing a sight that they were most definitely unprepared for.

Lana, still in the van and going at it for a second round didn't notice them standing there until a few moments later. She opened her eyes and was met with a sight that she was _also_ most definitely unprepared for.

In her freak-out, she pulled the wrench toy out, took her cap off and tried to hide the toy under the cap. The headphones fell off her head and the cord came out of the computer, filling the area with loud piano music and disgusting noises.

This caught the three other sisters off-guard as well, especially when they got an eyeful of what was actually playing on the screen.

"Is… is that 2 Girls 1 Cup?!" Lola shrieked in disgust, shielding her eyes from the horror she had just witnessed.

Lucy looked away as well, though Lisa, again, did not care. At least Lily wasn't here to have her innocence shattered.

Lana did not know what to do, brimming with shame and embarrassment from getting caught in such a compromising position.

"It's, uh… for a challenge?"


End file.
